When life throws us off course—whether through loss, setbacks, or daily struggles—it’s easy to wonder: how do some people seem to find their way back to calm while others feel stuck?
The answer often lies in resilience. But what does resilience truly mean, beyond the surface?
What Is the Deeper Meaning of Resilience?
Resilience is often thought of as “bouncing back.” But in reality, it’s much richer than that. True resilience means:
- Being able to endure pain, uncertainty, or disappointment without losing yourself
- Continuing to seek meaning and connection, even after hardship
- Adapting to change while still honouring your emotions
It’s not about “getting over” difficulties quickly or pretending everything is fine. It’s about allowing yourself to feel—and then, when you are ready, finding a way forward.
In Afrikaans, the word veerkragtigheid captures this beautifully: the ability to bend, to flex, and to recover without breaking.
Resilience Is Not Always Loud or Visible
Many people imagine resilience as bold bravery—grand gestures of strength. But often, it looks quieter:
- Choosing to get out of bed when everything feels heavy
- Allowing yourself to grieve without rushing the process
- Reaching out for support, even when it’s hard
- Setting a tiny goal when big dreams feel overwhelming
Resilience isn’t about avoiding struggle. It’s about moving through it with honesty, compassion, and courage—at your own pace.
What Shapes Our Resilience?
Resilience is shaped by many factors:
- Early life experiences: Feeling safe and loved as a child builds strong emotional roots.
- Community and connection: Trusted relationships strengthen our sense of belonging.
- Personal choices: Learning healthy coping tools and asking for help when needed.
- Faith and meaning: Spirituality or a personal sense of purpose can be powerful anchors.
Even if some of these were missing in your life, resilience can still be grown today—step by step.
Resilience Means Giving Yourself Permission
Most importantly, resilience gives you permission to:
- Feel your feelings without shame
- Struggle without seeing yourself as a failure
- Recover at your own speed, without comparison
You are not “weak” for finding life hard sometimes. You are human. And you already carry more strength than you realise.
If You Need Support, You’re Not Alone
Strength doesn’t mean doing everything alone. Sometimes resilience means reaching out—finding someone who can hold hope for you until you can hold it yourself.
If you’d like support in rediscovering your own resilience, I offer both in-person sessions at my Centurion practice and Zoom sessions nationwide. You’re also welcome to request a free Therapy Journal to gently guide your healing journey.
Ready to Begin?
Click here to book your session, or send us a WhatsApp message today.
In-person sessions: 120 Zambezi Avenue, Doringkloof, Centurion
Zoom sessions available nationwide.